Tuesday, May 31, 2011

The Last Supper with a Friend

I read the accounts of the Last Supper from the different gospels last week.  As I did, I began to tear up.  I had a glimpse into that moment.  My heart was with Him.

I imagined sitting with my friend, the most gentle and kind person I've ever known.  I imagined this person offering me everything.  Offering me ordinary items that I had partaken of many times, items that would come to mean so much more.  This time it was different.  This time we knew we wouldn't be together long.  This time I knew my precious, tender friend would pay the ultimate price for me.

I should be grateful.  I should be filled with awe.  Instead I was just so sad.  I didn't want to lose my friend.  It was all so unfair.  Even with all I'd seen, I didn't understand.

And I don't understand.  The atonement is such an incredible miracle.  Such a gift of ultimate tenderness and love.  A gift from a friend.  It has saved me so many times.  It has healed me.  When I've been a victim.  When I've messed up.  When I've hurt and not understood the pain.

I do not understand.  But I am grateful.  And I miss my friend.